It’s Not You, It’s Me: The 2007 Cadillac Escalade Review

[91 s-10baja]

The 2007 Cadillac Escalade ReviewIt’s Not You, It’s MeBy: Sara Lacey * Click here to read bio. Test drove: 7/19/2006 to 7/26/2006

I never had the opportunity to date and subsequently break up with the most popular guy in school. After a week driving the 2007 Cadillac Escalade, I now know what it would have been like. I roll up to the park, and all the playgroup moms excitedly ask me how I like the Escalade. When I give a tepid response, they just give me blank or confused looks. What on EARTH could I possibly not like about the Escalade? It is large, handsome, and clad in leather. DVD, navigation, heated and ventilated seats, fake wood accents. What more is there to want in a man? Er, car?
Like the popular guy who is attractive but not very smart, the Escalade is hot but its gas mileage is in the 13 miles per gallon range. The trips to the pump are exhausting. I swear I can actually see the gas gauge dip every time I accelerate. But it goes even deeper than that.
Maybe I just can’t handle the flash of the Escalade. I get looks everywhere I go, mostly from twenty-something males. Don’t get me wrong, typically this wouldn’t seem like a problem. It’s just that I know they’re hoping to catch a glimpse of someone much more glamorous and notable than little ol’ me. They’re looking at the 22” chrome wheels. They’re checking out the White Diamond paint. They’re not interested in the automatic tailgate or heated windshield wiper fluid. Maybe they’d be more impressed if the crew in the back was watching Scarface and not Monsters, Inc. (in Bose 5.1 sound, no less). They don’t really care that the rear cargo space might be a little small without the third row folded and that the other storage compartments are not as bountiful or as organized as I’d like. I doubt there’s interest in the fact that the LATCH connectors on the second-row captain’s chairs are simple and quick to use, even though the tether anchors are not (because they’re behind the seats, all the way down to the floor). And I really don’t think they’d care that the navigation system is a total mess to operate. Because it’s a Caddy, man! It’s an Escalade! Someone HOT must be in there.
http://motherproof.com/review_detail5.asp?ID=189

[5 watt]

The article mostly saves itself in the last paragraph.

So, you probably think you know what my summation is about the 2007 Cadillac Escalade. I have such a hard time getting used to it. I’m not sure how to handle it or its reputation. You might think I gave it back with a grin and sigh of relief. Not true. While the Escalade was a lot of work, in the end it was also fun. There’s something about a grumbling engine and lots of power that just feels good. By the last couple days of my test drive, I even smile while driving it. I love my kid telling me (as I put on the wireless headphones for the DVD in back), “Mom, this is the best car EVER!” And knowing both kids are excited to hop in and get themselves buckled up, well, that’s just great. They are high up and can see everything. The Red Hot Chili Peppers sound great in there, particularly with the sunroof open. So, Mr. Popular and I wind up having a good time afterall. I guess I just needed time to figure him out. When we part it’s bittersweet, but best for both of us. “It’s not you, it’s me” I tell the Cadillac. I just hope he understands.

At the other end of the spectrum, has playboy or GQ reviewed the slade.

[Threadkiller]

Perhaps motherproof thought Escalade was another name for "Kia Sedona"

[Michael_S]

Originally Posted by Threadkiller

Perhaps motherproof thought Escalade was another name for "Kia Sedona"

95% of the people that buy the Escalade use it as a family vehicle or just an oversized commuter. So it's not surprise she compared its features to a minivan.

[Threadkiller]

True, but nobody buys an Escalade with pure practicality in mind. It has an almost H2 level of image over function.

I'm glad she ended up appreciating it for what it is, instead of judging it for what it was never intended to be.

On another subject...

In the article, she refers to what I think is a disturbing trend- that people feel they have the right to judge and resent you merely by seeing what kind of car you drive. For some of us, cars are fun. Yes, an Escalade driver might be a jerk. Or, they might be someone who's always wanted a Cadillac and worked hard to get an education so they could afford nicer things. I think if people at least give something back to help those less fortunate, you can't fault them for buying quality goods. I would ask those judgemental folks- are you completely sure that nothing you own or use is at all more than the bare minimum that you need to survive? Shouldn't you cut back some more so you can help your fellow man? Who made you judge and jury to decide how much luxury is too much? Just because an Escalade is easily recognizable to your simple mind, you single it out. Whereas, you wouldn't know a gas-guzzing, mega-dollar S600 from a Passat.

[Payne78]

That was one h*ll of an opinion piece, from someone who obviously doesn't like SUV's to begin with. What a joke.

[DuSpinnst]

Originally Posted by Threadkiller

True, but nobody buys an Escalade with pure practicality in mind. It has an almost H2 level of image over function.

I'm glad she ended up appreciating it for what it is, instead of judging it for what it was never intended to be.

On another subject...

In the article, she refers to what I think is a disturbing trend- that people feel they have the right to judge and resent you merely by seeing what kind of car you drive. For some of us, cars are fun. Yes, an Escalade driver might be a jerk. Or, they might be someone who's always wanted a Cadillac and worked hard to get an education so they could afford nicer things. I think if people at least give something back to help those less fortunate, you can't fault them for buying quality goods. I would ask those judgemental folks- are you completely sure that nothing you own or use is at all more than the bare minimum that you need to survive? Shouldn't you cut back some more so you can help your fellow man? Who made you judge and jury to decide how much luxury is too much? Just because an Escalade is easily recognizable to your simple mind, you single it out. Whereas, you wouldn't know a gas-guzzing, mega-dollar S600 from a Passat.

Be careful, they are watching..... You might be abducted in the night and brainwashed to believe that there is only the "right way"

[goblue]

The Escalade is not a soccer mom's car - she would be at home in a Sienna and should write for Consumer Reports.

[guitarlix]

You call that a review?

[Carver]

The soccer mom's perspective was interesting - and soccer moms (with money) do buy these SUVs. It was more of a "touchy-feely" review than a proper mechanical/roadhandling review but it was a well writen article nonetheless.

[86fleet]

It's easy to tell it was written by a woman; in the stats section, there's no mention of horsepower.