Stop Me if Heard It

[69nova]

Or think they are too corny..

Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married.
The ceremony wasn't much but the reception was excellent.

A set of jumper cables walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says "I'll serve ye but don't start anything!"

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny yo you?"

Did you hear of the cannibal who PASSED his friend on the street?

An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The children were nothing to look at either.

I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a mussel.

I went to buy some camouflage trousers but couldn't find any.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish.

Two termites walk into a bar and one asks "Is the bar tender here?"

Two fish are swimming and one hits a concrete wall. He turns to the other and says "Dam!"

Two hydrogen atoms meet and one says "I've lost my electron." The other replies "Are you sure?" upon which the first says "Yes, I'm positive!"

I know--- Don't lose my day job!